7/5/99 - Hey buddies.  I'm stoned again.  Shitfuck!  Stoned again and at work.  I just came from Goodwill.  I was thinking about donating Bong Jeremy to them, b/c he doesn't draw real well.  But they don't take bongs.  So instead I gave them a lot of my old Guess? shirts and jeans, along with some other jeans and a couple of old work clothes.  And two pairs of Reebok -- I gave away my Van Exel's!  And my Patric Rafter's!  Shit! 

Whatever.  Before that I had lunch with Akiyo.  Goddamn,  I had no problem making eye contact with her.  I was staring into her eyes the whole time, well, when I wasn't looking at my Chicken Florentine or at her boobies.  Goddamn.  Anyhow, I was totally looking into her eyes, and I never wanted to come out.  I let her, and encouraged her, to talk about herself, so it was just like work, only I got to look and pay for a meal. 

All my shit is finally over in Santa Monica.  Now all I gotta do is assemble it.  Shit, I should be doing that right now!  Instead I'm baked at work.  Yeah, I hungout at Ray's yesterday for his Kalbifest '99.  Most of their time I was there I watched Ray cook, bought groceries with him and Jimbo and Jimbo's androgynous friend Waylan, and drank coke and lemonade.  I only got to eat a couple of plates before Ray and some other people went off to get stoned, and then I was feeling antsy so I got my pipes from them, sold some of the bud to this dood from NY, and smoked up and drove to Santa Monica.  Das' new 10-year-oldish girl left her suit in my closet with my work clothes, so when I drove them up I accidentally took her suit, too. Pretty dumb, Haole. 

So then I drove back from Santa Monica, smoked up more, came by here and did the e-mail thang, and then looked at a live-video nudie site or like 40 minutes.  It had this honey of a yuhjah naked and stuff, and like five of us were chatting with her and making jokes.  Inevitably one dood would be in the room, all silent, and blurt out, "Sam, can we see your sexy pussy?"  And she would spread her legs and finger herself for like seven or eight minutes.  It was interesting.  Don't think I'll do it again, though.  Weird developing those kinds of habits.  Especially when only my work connection can deliver the video with good speed.  And especially when I don't have a computer of my own.  Don't need to be caught with my hands down my pants at work, now do I?  Although someone else's hand in my pants wouldn't be as bad...

Man, I need some female lovin'.  I have this love/hate attitude towards relationships now.  I like to see people in them, or talk about them, b/c it's so interesting to here about that shit, what love is like and what it looks like, what problems arise, what living with someone is like, etc.  But I also get so angry at myself for being such a loser as to never having been in a relationship that I have to physically turn away or occasionally change the subject. 

Man, I love being stoned.  Shit, too bad I can't get anything productive done.  I need to put together my furniture, go to the dry cleaner's, buy groceries, and return the car to LAX, but instead I'm just chilling at work.  What a fuck moron I am!

Oh yo, after I came back from work last nite, I went to Ray's to see if there was any food left and to pick up the rest of my gear.  So I get there, and this guy Mike was there.  Mike's a big drinking and golf buddy of Das and a few other guys there.  So Das is outside really drunk, and then he kind of disappears, and Mike announces to everyone in the garage, "I'm going to get me some Skippy."  I thought Skippy was a dog, although I soon found out different.  Farand explained "Skippy" -- Skippy is peanut butter, and peanut butter is just creamed nuts.  So "Skippy" is when you bang a girl and she cums on your nuts.  Anyhow, enough of that.  So I'm like whatever, and then Mike comes outside and says, "Oh shit, Das is really pissed, he's really mad."  I guess Mike told Ngan that he wanted some of her Skippy or something.  And naturally Das got pissed.  So a few minutes later Das comes into the garage really drunk and really mad, and his buddy Jason (I'm one of his two "white friends") has to hold Das back for a minute until Das assures us he just wants to talk to Mike.  So they go off and talk, and we all go inside until we here Ray yell from outside, and as we go outside Das stumbles in and says, "Mike is really fucked up," as he passes by us.  So we see Mike laying on the ground, mumbling about his eye. 

Naturally we were thinking Das punched Mike, except that Das is a pacifist.  But I guess they were just fucking around and Das' jaw slammed into Mike's eye.  In my current state, I think there's a chance it was intentional on Das' part, but not likely.  Who the hell leads with their jaw?

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